Bye 2020. Hello the rest of the future.
On jail, deportation, family & cancer, near bankruptcy, COVID and how it all worked out. Thank you 2020.
Three months ago, freshly out of a US detention center and deported back to the Caribbean, I was staying at a certain inspiring billionaire’s beach front villa for a few days.
At the dinner table we were playing a sort of QA game and my friend Xander asked what is the most valuable thing I learned this year? I responded that this is the first year when I feel I haven’t really learned anything new, rather finally got to apply what I learned before to get myself out of trouble — over and over.
Perhaps I just wrote the most gangster intro paragraph this blog will ever carry! But such was that week, one day I was sleeping on the floor, handcuffed and questioned for many hours, another I was staying in a beautiful billionaire villa, trying to marry the two in my head. Let’s frame it for you my dear reader: I do not get to hang around billionaire places often and it was my first time ever in real handcuffs. But such was the week and I think it was very resembling of my 2020 overall.
2020 ended. “2020” is far from ending, for better or worse.
In my ‘19 summary post I shared my own 20 lessons for 2020. In quite a timely manner these, together with the 30 lessons I collected before, became incredibly handy this past year. Therefore after 2020, my biggest insight was, that spending some time to understand your mistakes really really helps.
Lessons work! Who knew.
So this post will be about my mishaps and mistakes, but also recoveries, growth and the future.
Back to 2020. My dad suddenly got a rapidly growing cancer, my company almost went bankrupt, I got banned from the US, to name a few. It was quite a brutal mess to navigate.
COVID with all its lockdowns, social rewiring, economy crash, riots, undoing of trust, exposed global social injustices, death, tiger business, tectonic shakes at the brink of 4th industrial revolution, zoom overload and the threat of the virus itself, was for me really minuscule in comparison. And I know even by itself it would have given me quite a crappy year, like for pretty much all of us.
Not to one-up your shitty year, but for me it was sort of worse even. And yet the year ends on a massively positive note. And hopefully this can inspire a positive outlook for you too, my dear reader.
My posts typically intertwine my work and personal life, they always have, as the two tend to be quite in bed with each other anyway. But I just shared recent events of HOO KOO E KOO here with some learnings — give it a read!
So here, this time, I’ll keep it fully personal and just give an overview of what 1 year can hold and why do I feel positive about the future — and it all has barely anything to do with COVID.
Before I get to it, I want to thank all the incredible friends, team mates, my new business partner, Chris for being there, pushing ahead and working asses off to turn things around 💛 And my dad for never losing optimism and inspiring me every day. I want to thank Rocio who put up with a lot and yet we somehow found a way to be together again.
I was about to scrap this entire post as an over-share and simply focus just on the thank you note, but following a conversation with my friend James (now Global Creative Director of Pinterest and soon HKEK’s advisor! 🙌) yesterday, I feel like it deserves to be shared.
2021 is already shaping up to be an incredible follow up to what happened, but I’ll get to this.
For now, here it is, my 2020 in review, for everyone to see. Let’s use a form of a diary this time, but trust me there will be some interesting nuggets in there.
January
On 1st or 2nd I woke up newly single, almost broke, hangover and not too satisfied with the night and day of celebrations I just had. There was plenty to be anxious about, my dear friend and key team member Yukiko had just passed away, HKEK was running out of cash, the dream of our new life we constructed in Dominican Republic was collapsing. Now it was just me, alone, in a sort of ridiculous penthouse by the beach, with so many issues to solve.
I decided 2020 will be for me a year when I break through my inhibitions. Go explore new connections, make new friends, learn to DJ finally, not fall newly in love with a girl (for a change) and perhaps finally get back to skydiving. I bought myself some DJ gear when in NYC to start.
A week later I had the opportunity to speak about our efforts to Sir Richard Branson and all guests of the Ultramarine Ocean Summit, while Sir Richard was wearing our Future Horizon necklace and sitting right in front of me. Surreal. Thank you Susi Mai!
I got nearly an hour of 1:1 talk time with Richard, mostly while cycling together (he’s a beast!), where I thought I’d be lucky to have 1 minute, if at all!
Ultimately I even got to DJ in the Temple (where The Elders were born by Nelson Mandela!) on the island — thanks Waël! ❤️.
All in all, I thought stepping out my comfort zones is going quite well already. I never got to the skydiving course, next months had some distractions up their cuff.
February
I decided to follow through, against all odds, and organize something I started putting together late 2019 — a new sustainability-focused mini festival called Future Horizon. February was a month I spent preparing the event while still battling to turn struggling HOO KOO E KOO around from its losses.
March
We did it! Future Horizon happened and it worked out quite well. We achieved the two goals we had: to make people happy with the experience and make a measurable impact.
At the same time, the same week really, COVID arrived to the west, things got weird. Stock market crashed right during our event.
The Future Horizon community achieved incredible things right after the event, from leading towards donating 1,000,000 masks to healthcare workers, to building a new coral reef to feeding 10,000 people and helping raise $70+ million to help instill democracy (more on this below…). I’m still amazed.
View more and the video here: https://futurehorizon.to
April
Markets shifted, projects went on hold. HKEK was now seriously facing bankruptcy and had just (maybe) weeks of runway. I had almost 0 money left to loan to the company.
Chris, my friend and now consultant helped more and more and we got to work. Since April I worked almost non-stop for 3 months to come.
Dominican Republic introduced harsh lockdown measures — road blocks, no beach access, 5pm curfew. We turned my ghost town apartment into a pastiche speakeasy for friends where we’d gather by candlelight. We had incredible dinners there. We kited when possible, outside of town. But the remaining 16 or so hours of every day, I pretty much just worked for 3 months straight. In all truth, I haven’t done this since 2015 and it kind of felt great.
May
Things were turning around for HOO KOO E KOO, we were growing and hiring people again. It started looking good. But I couldn’t sleep at night and still didn’t feel like dating anyone. I was increasingly miserable and I was sure it wasn’t burn out. I realized I still love my ex too much. I wrote to her and she wrote back. We exchanged some 200 pages worth of emails as she later calculated, before we were ready to speak to each other on a phone.
On another plane, I had only ever bought one stock before, TSLA back in 2016 and held on to it. Now I had some money again, so I invested some more in various stocks.
June
It turned out both my ex and I were going to Puerto Rico, so we decided to meet there. I ended up staying for over 2 months, unsure of constantly changing travel restrictions I asked if my friends could pack my apartment in DR (thank you Sabrina, Ari, Kyle & Ange!❤️) and I had it all shipped to a storage.
Following many months of working together, Chris my friend and collaborator of many years now became a partner at HKEK and haskicked ass on all fronts ever since 🔥 I can’t be more grateful and it’s a total game changer to have a partner, especially in such a kind and thoughtful person 💛 Meanwhile…
At the same time we started moon-lighting on a new project: DefeatByTweet and then its parent OneForDemocracy. A way to raise money in fun ways and donate to black-led organizations in US swing states. For me personally this is a way to do what we can to help implement environmental protection policies, so needed and so neglected by the Trump administration — with a massive global effect. A Biden win could be a step in a more sane direction.
OneForDemocracy ended up raising over $70M dollars later in 2020, and that wasn’t even the end of it. It was all worth it!
July
I sold most of my stock investments and with part of the gain I bought a nice modified white Tesla Model 3 Performance. Arguably the worst idea I had this year (maybe other than selling TSLA stock so early). As it soon turned out, I’d barely ever be in Puerto Rico... But it felt great at the time and felt like I got it “for free” as just the Tesla stock upside covered it 🤷♂️ Mostly pain in the ass though.
Meanwhile, I was so sure Puerto Rico was a good idea as a foot-hold for my future, that I shipped my entire apartment from DR to PR and even planned a new Future Horizon event there. This in hindsight was not such a bad idea as I had to store my stuff somewhere safe anyway, but what ensued is definitely not what I have foreseen.
August
First massive blow 💥
I learned that my dad has a serious and fast spreading case of cancer. He could have as little as 3 months.
I stored my things and flew out of Puerto Rico on a few days’ notice. I spent 7 weeks in Poland and Europe. More than in years! This fall I spent more time with my immediate family than I believe in 16 years. The “you go tell them” lesson from last year drove me there. At the same time I split up with her again. Despite the beautiful summer we had together I felt like there is just too much misunderstanding. Like I have too much fear.
September
Seeing the family more was beyond important. I setup a little copy of my studio setup in Poland, so that I can come back more often while staying on top of things.
My dad was doing better and doctors we connected confirmed a path to recovery. His 3 month death sentence got revised to a 10–15 year path to full recovery. I couldn’t be happier. Europe started getting cold and rainy, it was time to head back.
October
Second massive blow 💥💥
I flew to Dominican Republic and then to Puerto Rico. On arrival it turned out my VISA got cancelled and I got detained for 2 nights, questioned and deported back to DR.
Yep. I have never overstayed or anything to that tune before. And here I was with a 5 year ban for entry to the US. A lot can happen in 5 years.
Those two days made me realize how brutal can US border policy be, and that was for me, a “self-privileged” white tall guy from Europe, I can’t even imagine what happens to others. I feel like this first hand experience will live with me forever and power some initiatives to come.
It was quite shocking at the time, but also a great opportunity to meditate and form an alternative plan. As soon as out I went to spend time in the aforementioned beach front villa. Contrast between that and sleeping on a cell floor within the same week makes for perhaps the weirdest week I had, so far.
November
When just out of the detention center, I received a message — a friend was inviting to an epic halloween party in Tulum, Mexico. It sounded great and having all my previous plans wiped made it easy to say I’m in.
While at the detention center, I managed to send one email, and it was to her, my then again, ex. I really wanted to re-connect.
She replied some 2 weeks later telling me she lives in Tulum now and has for a couple of months. And that she’s going to this one party… Turned out we’re going to the same one. I thought maybe that is a sign, and I should see what that can bring.
Also, Biden won. It turned out we actually did make a difference and what my friends and partners had brilliantly planned — to pump the money in increased voter turn out in swing states, worked!
3 months later, as I’m still waiting for my paperwork that I had to request through the US Freedom of Information Act, I don’t know for sure if this is what got my VISA cancelled. I wasn’t told a thing, I was just asked questions. But chances are this is it, since I’ve never had a crime to my name.
Honestly if this is what it took for me to sacrifice in order to help at least a little to push the world onto a more sustainable path, I don’t regret it at all.
Two days ago part of the same organization assured black voter turn out in Georgia, which has led to Democrats taking the US senate. What ensued is all over the media, but longer term future started looking much more sustainable.
Last night, following those insane events, Biden was confirmed as the President of the US.
Can’t wait to see where this takes the world.
December
Following work with lawyers, it looks like I should regain my US VISA within months, which is not that bad. It will be quite a process but to be fair, it was worth it.
We also closed HKEK year with over 180% growth. That’s less growth than in 2019. But hey it was 2020 and it was a rough year for me for far more reasons than just COVID. I feel really good about it. I wish more of us could look back to 2020 and be happy about everything that transpired now, but I think for most of us this is coming — it was an important year. A tough one, but we made it and just by inertia, our trajectory into the new year looks good!
I spent xmas with the family which was amazing. It was a bit of a hike to make it to Poland just for that time, self-quarantine, test multiple times and get back the other way. But 100% worth it. The lessons from 2019 taught me this is beyond important.
We’re back together with Rocio. I kept my word not falling in love again, though this is not what I expected. As I’m finishing this post we’re about to move to a little island in Brazil together for a while, and have just sailed around little islands for a week, the ending of 2020 could be far worse.
The Future
Someone recently emailed me to say:
“Those who create the future need not to be afraid of it.”
I loved this quote. I like to think I create “my” future to the extent where the creative effect is larger portion of time than reactive survival.
I think we all constantly negotiate the creation of our future vs what life throws at us, every moment, every sliver of time.
But I feel this new year will open a stage to truly create one… Something we’ve been preparing for and something we truly are ready to do.
For most of us last year was about undoing, reframing, seeing and navigating around obstacles. It was quite a ride for me, but also a testament to how much stronger I am. I never lost it, I never became depressed, I never felt caught out off guard. I just did what I could with the waves that I had.
And right now it feels again like we truly are in for a beautiful ride!
I wish you all an incredible 2021! It might not be easier than 2020, but hey, we’ve already coped with 2020. Let’s just focus on creating our future a bit more and there will be nothing to be afraid of. We have so many lessons already, we just need to make sure to use them. And keep learning.
Much love! ❤️
If you made it all the way here and still would like to know more,
see my recent HOO KOO E KOO 5 year anniversary recap here.
